Eps 441: Exploring “sugar dating” with Amy Lang and Christy Keating

Episode 441

Join me and my good friends Amy Lang and Christy Keating as we dig into the trend of “sugar dating.” Why do we care? Well, this is a growing trend on college campuses and it’s important for parents to be informed and able to have conversations with their young adult children.

My guests today are Amy Lang and Christy Keating.  I am so glad you’re here today – this episode may be distressing, but it’s super important to be aware of our topic: sugar dating.  

Sugar dating is a transactional arrangement between an older adult and younger adult to exchange dating for money, trips, clothes, etc.  Amy, Christy, and I talk about if this is just prostitution or actually a win-win arrangement.  We get into the risks these young women face and how the internet facilitates these relationships.  Amy, Christy, and I discuss how women can get out of the situation when they’re not comfortable and how to talk to our kids about this.  Christy brings up that some young people feel empowered by sugaring, and why it’s actually not empowering or sex positive.  Amy advises asking your teens what they know about sugar dating and letting them educate you. 

Come back next month for Part 2, because Amy & Christy are returning to chat with me about pornography – good times! 

Amy Lang

A sexual health educator for over 27 years, Amy Lang (she/her) helps parents learn how to talk with their kids about sexuality. With her lively, engaging, and down-to-earth style, she shows parents they really can become their kids’ go-to birds and bees source. 

Amy is certificated in neurodiversity and sexuality and helps parents of neurodiverse kids tackle this important part of parenting. Amy is the author of three books; and has online courses. Her podcast, Just Say This, reaches thousands of listeners a month.

Amy is still married to her first husband and they are getting the hang of parenting their recently launched man-child. She lives in Seattle WA and you can learn more about her work at BirdsAndBeesAndKids.com and BBKPros.com.

Christy Keating

Christy Keating is the founder of The Heartful Parent Collective, which includes Heartful Parent Coaching, Savvy Parents Safe Kids, The Heartful Parent Academy, The Safe Parenting Summit, and The Heartful Parent Podcast.

Christy is a licensed attorney turned Certified Parent Coach, positive discipline educator, and Fair Play Facilitator. Christy serves as a board member for the National Coalition to Prevent Child Sexual Abuse and Exploitation.

She is a fierce advocate for women and families, and loves working with parents on a wide variety of issues, from behavior issues to balancing competing life demands. She loves helping parents and professionals discover newfound energy in their work, personal lives, and parenting. Christy is a strong believer that we are all—parents and professionals alike–deserving of support, and that we never go wrong when we lift another parent up.

Christy lives in the greater Seattle area with her husband of 17 years, their two amazing daughters.

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Takeaways from the show

https://www.besproutable.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/Amy-and-Christy.png
  • What is sugar dating? 
  • How common is it? 
  • Is it a win-win situation?  Is this prostitution? 
  • Why do young women do this?  What are the risks? 
  • How is this facilitated on the internet? 
  • How do we talk about sugar dating with our kids?  When and how often? 
  • Sugar dating is not always younger women & older men – various dynamics occur
  • Is this empowering?  Is this sex positive? 
  • How can we stay curious & influential when people we know are sugaring?  How do we talk to our kids about this? 
  • “The hard conversations are the most important”

 

 

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Transcription

SPEAKERS
Casey O'Roarty, Christy Keating, Amy Lang

Casey O'Roarty 00:03
Hey, welcome to the joyful courage podcast a place for inspiration and transformation as we try and keep it together, while parenting our tweens and teens. This is real work people and when we can focus on our own growth, and nurturing the connection with our kids, we can move through the turbulence in a way that allows for relationships to remain intact. My name is Casey already I am your fearless host. I'm a positive discipline trainer, space holder coach and the adolescent lead at Sproutsocial. I am also the mama to a 20 year old daughter and 17 year old son walking right beside you on this path of raising our kids with positive discipline and conscious parenting. This show is meant to be a resource to you and I work really hard to keep it real, transparent and authentic so that you feel seen and supported. Today is an interview and I have no doubt that what you hear will be useful to you. Please don't forget sharing truly is caring. If you love today's show, please pass the link around snap a screenshot posted on your socials or texted to your friends. Together we can make an even bigger impact on families all around the globe. I'm so glad that you're here. Enjoy the show

Casey O'Roarty 01:19
all right, listeners. Welcome back. I am so glad that you are listening in today. Today we are amongst friends friends in my life friends of the podcast two ladies that I have reached out to more than one time on my own personal parenting journey. You might know them but I'm still going to introduce them to you first is my friend Amy Lange, a sexual health educator for over 27 years, Amy helps parents learn how to talk with their kids about sexuality. With her lively engaging in Down to Earth style. She shows parents they really can become their kids go to birds and bees source. Amy is certified in neuro diversity and sexuality and helps parents of neuro diverse kids tackle this important part of parenting. She is the author of three books and has online courses her podcast just say this reaches 1000s of listeners each month. Amy is still married to her first husband and they are getting the hang of parenting. They're recently launched manchild she lives in Seattle, and you can learn more about her and her work at birds and bees and kids.com and BB K proz.com. My other friends in the virtual studio is Christy Keating Christie is the founder of the heartful parenting collective, which includes heartful parent coaching savvy parents Safe Kids, the heartful Parent Academy, the safe parenting Summit, and the heartful parenting podcast. I don't know why hurtful is so hard for me to say. Christie is a licenced attorney turned certified parent coach, positive discipline educator and fair play facilitator. Christie serves as a board member for the National Coalition to prevent child sexual abuse and exploitation. She is a fierce advocate for women and family and loves working with parents on a wide variety of issues from behaviour issues to balancing competing life demands she loves helping parents and professionals discover new found energy in their work personal lives and parenting Christie is a strong believer that we are all parents and professionals alike deserving of support and that we never go wrong when we left another parent app Christie also lives in Seattle with her husband of 17 years and two amazing daughters. Hey, ladies. Hi Casey. I'm giving Christie like we cuz she doesn't quite live in Seattle, but close enough. Close enough. Deanna Lish ah, more than Seattle ish. Well, we're all Pacific Northwesterners we're all Western Washington gals. So there you go. I'm so excited to have you both here. This is a two parter. So listeners you are tuning into Part One. And we're going to be talking about something that may be distressing to listeners. Yeah, welcome to our world. And super important that we shed light on and make parents aware of this phenomenon, which isn't new, but feels like it has a whole new light on it. I don't know, sugar dating. We're gonna talk about sugar dating today. And listeners, you might be like, What the hell is that? So we're gonna start with you too. What do you know about sugar dating?

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