Eps 189: Part Two of Using the Law of Attraction on the Parenting Journey

Transcription

Casey O'Roarty 0:04
Hey, what is up podcast, listeners, I am so glad that you have found yourself at the joyful courage podcast. This is a place where we celebrate real and raw conversations about raising kids with conscious parenting and positive discipline. I'm your host. Casey o'rourdy, I'm a facilitator. I'm a parent coach. Most importantly, I am a mom of two teenagers, and I am walking the path of more mindful, intentional parenting right alongside of you. Please know that this podcast is created for you. I create it for you and for our community. And if you love it, feel free to share it with all of your family and friends over social media. Let's spread the word. Let's get as many people as possible listening to this show. Please write a review on Apple's podcast, formerly known as iTunes, and join the Patreon community, where parents, just like you are contributing just a small little amount each month to the show and enjoying perks like monthly webinars and community conversations about the content you hear on this podcast. Check the show notes for links and more details on all of that. I am so, so grateful that you are here and now enjoy the show.

Hey everybody, joyful courage, calming the drama and taking control of your parenting journey is available. It's available. It's ready for you to buy. If you go to joyful courage.com/book, you will be prompted and given a little button to take you where you need to go and buy the book. And it was so great because the other day in the live in love with joyful courage group, somebody posted a question of, does anybody have any suggestions of books about mindfulness? And I got to respond after a couple other people mentioned some amazing resources. I also got to say this is actually exactly what my book's about. My book is about mindfulness. It's about self regulation. It's about learning how to stay connected and grounded while your kids go through what they go through, grow through what they grow through, right? So check it out. Joyful courage.com/book. Go get your copy today and let me know what you think. Hey, everybody, so happy to be back with you for another solo show. So much happening right now. Oh my gosh, it's crazy. When I work with clients, I always start the hour or the call with a grounding meditation, because I think we should all be dropping into the present moment more often, and I like to use my time with my people as an opportunity to practice how that can feel. And after we do a few minutes of that, I ask, what are you celebrating? I love this question because it reminds my clients that there is always something to celebrate, something to look at as a gift. I know that sometimes it can feel stretchy, but when we challenge ourselves to find some gratitude, it shifts the energy, and it opens up more possibilities, and it allows for a really sweet opening to a call that often is about the things that aren't going well. So I'm going to start this show with sharing some of my own celebrations. So first, I am celebrating all of the love that the community has showered me with throughout this book launch. My book launched last Monday, and it's been amazing. You people are amazing. Thank you for the reviews you have written on Amazon and Goodreads and barnesandnoble.com thank you for the social media shout outs. I've been trying to capture a lot of the pictures and repost them in my Instagram and Facebook story. Thank you for the sweet, sweet comments that you are posting or commenting on under my posts or sending me directly. I know you know this, but I'm just gonna say it again. I do this work for all of us, right? All of us. I'm so honored when you let me know that it makes a difference in your life. So keep telling me that. Thank you. It's a it's my favorite it's my favorite thing to do. I. Another celebration is Oh, before I go there, I also want to say, for those of you that are local, this show is coming out. Oh, the show is coming out May 28 Tuesday, May 28 and tonight, if you're listening, on Tuesday May 28 tonight is the book launch party, and I'm going to be at third place books in Lake Forest Park Washington, from seven to nine. I'm going to read from the book and do a little Q and A and do some book signing. So if you don't have anything going on this evening, come play. Come meet me. And if you do have things going on, ask for help and delegate and come see me All right. Another celebration is that I am getting the practice, the opportunity to practice, not taking things personally with my kids lately, like I'm getting a lot of these opportunities, right? We're wrapping up the school year. They're finishing up projects and things we have a move that's happening, and a few other life experiences that have upped the level of stress at our house. And I don't think stress is a bad thing, but stress definitely makes the foundation a little shaky, right? It shakes up the foundation a bit, and the kids are navigating it all the best they can, right? I'm gonna say that again, my kids are navigating the stress that they're experiencing the best they can. How I experience them is being irritated, withdrawn, annoyed at me, not wanting to talk to me. Oh my gosh. And this type of behavior is super easy for me to translate into like, Why are you treating me like this? Like, I respond to this from a place of hurt and incredulity. I don't think that's a word, but I'm like, incredulous. Like, why? Why would you treat me like this? Or, you know, it hurts my feelings when you shut me out. You know, which is something I actually said out loud to one of them last night. And guess what? They're doing the best they can with the tools they have. They're navigating their life right now, and the increase in stress and the behavior is simply an indicator that they are in it and that they're navigating some stressful times, it's not about me, it's not about me, it's not about me, it's not about me, it's not about me, right? So back to the celebration I am in the fire of this opportunity to let go of making their behavior about me and instead creating my generating my own validation, right, creating my own okayness, standing with them and for them, without entangling myself in whatever the experiences that they are having, right, this is my opportunity to walk my talk. This is when it matters most that I choose to tell the story of it's not about me. The goal is not to be codependent, right? Like, that's the goal not to be in a codependent relationship with my child, right? So here it is. This is the chance. These are the moments where we get to separate ourselves from our kids experiences and behaviors and to generate the emotions that we want to be feeling, regardless of what's happening for for them.

So yeah, remember a few weeks ago, fiercely committed yet lovingly detached, fiercely committed? Yes, I get that lovingly detached, detached, always a work in progress, right? But forward movement, one final celebration before I get into the juice of the podcast. And there's so many, so many celebrations right now, but I'm just going to end on this final one. There is a new iTunes review from my friend, colleague and joyful courage Academy parenting teens participant, Katie Lowry. Katie wrote love Casey five stars. Casey was meant to do this work. If you're looking for a podcast that will support you on your parenting journey and join a community of parents who are supporting one another, you need to listen to this podcast. I mean, seriously, she is changing the world with this podcast. It is so loving and. Inspiring, encouraging and supportive of you as a parent, I honestly can't say enough good things about Casey and the love she is sending out to the world through the joyful courage podcast. XOXO, huh? Katie, thank you so much. I am so deeply honored that I get to serve you and everyone else who's listening right now, I can't even really put into words the depth of gratitude that I have for the community and that I get to do what I love to do, and that it is useful to you. So yay. So I want to do a follow up show to Episode 187 to remind you that was my last solo show two weeks ago where I got really excited about the law of attraction and specifically about the opportunity to tell a different story and generate a different experience. And I got a lot of curiosity about that particular show. A lot of you, it really landed with it really resonated. And then some of you had some questions. And I love that. I love it, because I just find the whole concept of launch of attraction so fascinating, and I am in the learning. I am a student. I am not an expert. I'm learning it, I'm digesting it. I'm making sense of it. And what I enthusiastically shared about was how we can shift our interpretation of our current situation and invite something new and different. And let me say, which I hope I said in episode 187 I hope that I mentioned this. I am not a mental health expert, nor am I like I said, a law of attraction expert. I am just a gal who is super excited about my own experience with law of attraction and see that there is some overlap with the parenting journey. And so it's really exciting to me. When I get excited about something, I I have to share it. I have to share it. So, like I said, I got some feedback around what I was sharing. And so I just kind of want to expand a little bit more on the content of 187 for this show. So I don't think you need to listen to 187 to get some takeaways. But if you want to stop this podcast and go back two weeks and listen to 187 and then resume, that's cool, you can do that, but you don't have to something that I want to point out and say, and I'm not sure that I was explicit enough in 187 about this is, let's just start by saying and validating the idea and the real life experience that life can be incredibly challenging. Most, if not all of us have navigated or are navigating some deep hardship. This might be financial hardship, it might be painful relationships, it might be mental or physical health issues or some kind of painful loss, right? Some of you are experiencing that now. Some of you have experienced that in your past, or maybe some of us are, you know, both and right? I want to acknowledge you. I want to acknowledge you. You the person that's listening, who is really worried about getting the bills paid. Who's worried about a sick parent or friend? I want to see and acknowledge you, the people that are listening, who you know have differently wired kids that make life challenging. I want to acknowledge those of you that might be going through a messy divorce or a sudden job loss. I want to acknowledge you, and I don't in any way want to minimize how difficult life feels right now, right? I don't want my goal is not to minimize that you might be in the hardest season of life right now. You might be hurting and really unable to see a future that could be any different than the one that you are experiencing. And there is no blame there. There is no shame there. That is simply where you might be finding yourself. And this is a really hard. A place to be right. And maybe you're someone who the blows have come run one right after the other, and the last thing you want to hear is me, some voice coming through your device saying, oh, you know, just change your story, and everything will be better. Just change your story. Just change how you talk about it, and it'll change your life, right? I get that it could, that can feel dismissive and as though the big things you're going through are trivial, and that is not my intent. Okay, that's not my intent. My intent is to stand for you. I want to take a stand for you, regardless of what is currently alive in your life. And a lot of you reach out to me in a variety of ways. And you share with me what you're navigating. You share with me what's hard right now, what you're worried about, what your fears are, what your regrets are. And I just want to say that each and every one of you, 100% have the power to shift the way you are experiencing it, whatever your challenge is, and what you believe about it, right? Do you believe me? You might be sitting there saying, Well, this might be true for other people, but this isn't true for me. And I'm going to say, I'm going to challenge you, and I'm going to push back, and I'm going to say, you too, have the power to shift the way you are experiencing the challenges in your life and what you believe to be true about them. And yes, rocks are hard, water is wet, the bills have to be paid. Your children need you. Your teenager is angry. You aren't getting any work. Your Relationship sucks. Whatever your challenge is your challenge is. So here's my question to you, what do you want? What do you want? What do you want most? And when you consider that question, what do you want most? Is what you want, possible meaning, I want to win the lottery. Okay, great, don't we all. And what would winning the lottery get you? Financial freedom, right? Financial freedom. Okay, so what you want is financial freedom. You want ease in finances. You want to feel safe financially, right? What might happen if you spend some time each day believing that things are in motion, things you can't see currently, things are in motion to bring financial freedom to you. What if you spent time each day believing that, trusting that, expecting that, doesn't mean you get a big fact check in the mail today, but it might mean that things that you can't see, that you can't know, are in process to offer you opportunity for financial freedom. Are you willing to try that for a period of time? Are you willing to try that on? And what about creating a gratitude practice right now, that includes the things that you currently have, that you're grateful for right what exists right now in your Current situation, that you're grateful for?

Can you imagine the energy you would be creating if this was a part of your daily experience, this gratitude practice? Might you spend more time in the mindset of things are okay, instead of that kind of urgent, urgent, frantic place of things aren't okay, and they're not going to be okay. Might you spend a little bit more time in this mindset of, I have what I need today, I'm okay today. And might that shift your trajectory towards more seeing, experiencing and pulling in more opportunities and experiences, and if those things weren't to happen, how would it change your life to simply be in gratitude for what is right now, right or what about I want my kids needs to go away, or I want my teenager to. Lose the anger again. Okay? What will that ultimately get you? Perhaps a feeling of acceptance, ease, connection. So maybe the request is, I want to feel acceptance, ease and connection and again. What might happen if you spent time each day, feeling those things, generating the experience in your body of acceptance, ease and connection for yourself, instead of needing it to come from the outside in what happens when we release our children from the job and the responsibility of making us feel a certain way, might we show up better for them, without this expectation and need for them to be a certain way For us to experience good feelings, what opens up and yeah, and when you show up differently, so will they we know this. How many times have you had the experience of looking back at the end of the day and doing a face palm all over the times you made situations worse, right? Doing that face palm over all the things you did that day that looking back in retrospect, actually made things worse. I know I'm not alone, and rocks are hard. Water is wet. There are things we can't change. There are things we can't manifest away, but there is always, always choice in how we show up to those things, and in that choice we can be in the creation of something new. I say that again, there is always choice in how we show up to things, and in that choice we can be in the creation of something new in the way we choose to talk about it, according to the law of attraction, we are sending out signals and messages and vibrations that are being responded to in kind by the universe or God or source, or whatever you reference higher power as. And if you are not a higher power person, then you probably haven't made it this far into this episode. But I'm assuming that those of you that are listening, when I say higher power, something comes to mind. And I'm assuming, if you believe in the higher power and any kind of higher power, that I'm trusting, that you trust your higher power, that you trust that everything happens for a reason, that you trust that there is purpose to this journey of life that we're on that isn't only the journey of our kids living in our house. The journey is much longer than that, and what happens when we show up over and over again with this idea that we can decide how we experience things, or maybe we notice that we're kind of getting down in the dumps, that we're falling into the pit, and We decide like, Yep, I'm in a pit, and I know that someone or something is going to show up with a ladder, so I'm not going to freak out about being in the pit, right? And maybe while I wait, I'll see if I can't dig out a little handhold here or there, or Wow, accepting being in the pit, maybe I look around and I see creative things that I can use to help me boost me up and out of the pit. Now, again, I mentioned at the beginning, I am not a mental health professional, so this is one of the questions that I got about the last show. Is, what about law of attraction and depression? I don't want to be irresponsible here, so I'm going to say, if you have something like depression going on, please seek the advice of a doctor. Right? Talk to your mental health professional. Please. If something is telling you, in your in your gut, that something's off, go get help. That being said, how could it possibly hurt anyone to support them in changing the way they see experience and talk about their life? So even if you're listening to this and you're feeling like I can't get out of the loop of the feeling of darkness and the feeling the feelings that come with depression, what if, once a day you write one sentence as your future self, who's on the other side and is feeling better, right? What if once a day you simply write down One feeling that you believe? That one day you might feel, that you could feel, is that going to hurt you? This is not in lieu of getting a good mental health provider. Okay, so please, hear me there, please, please, please. And there's a lot of practices, I'm actually going to put a little link in the show notes of an article that I found about about this depression and law of attraction. So you can check out more there, but again, again and again and again, there is no blame happening here, none. I invite you to take what you want from what I shared and leave the rest behind if you are resistant to this idea of choice and pivoting and shifting our thinking and our way of being. If you're resistant to what I'm sharing, I I invite you to challenge yourself there. I do think this is for everyone. Law of Attraction is for everyone. It's available to everyone, and if you feel like it isn't for you, I simply invite you to dig in there and do some exploring and ask yourself, but what if it was? What if it was? You get to design your life, peeps, you you get to design your life. And isn't that so exciting? You joyful courage community, thank you so much for tuning in each and every week. Big thanks and love to my team, including my producer, Chris Mann at pod shaper. Be sure to join the discussion over at the live and love with joyful courage group page, as well as the joyful courage business pages on Facebook and Instagram. Subscribe to the show through Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google Play. I Heart Radio, really anywhere you find your favorite podcasts. Also, I mentioned Patreon at the beginning of the show. Check it out, www.patreon.com/joyful courage. This is where you can contribute to the show and take advantage of patron perks like content rich monthly webinars and deeper discussions about what's being shared on the podcast. You will like it. Www, dot P, A, T, R, E, O n.com/joyful, courage. Any comments or feedback about this show or any others can be sent. Casey at joyful courage.com I personally read and respond to all the emails that come my way. So reach out. You can also sign up for my bi weekly newsletter at joyful courage.com just go to the website. Sign up for that. Take a breath. Drop into your body, find the balcony seat and trust that everyone is going to be okay. Big Love to each and every one of you have a beautiful rest of your day.