Positive Discipline Parenting Blog

How do I teach kids to share?

It is completely unrealistic, developmentally, to expect young children to share. What you CAN teach them, explicitly is what it means to share (usually taking turns) and the skills they need to be practicing mutually respectful sharing.

Hitting. When will it end?

How to stop toddlers from hitting TWENTY TIMES! I remember thinking, I’m pretty sure I’ve repeated myself twenty freaking times today. I was so annoyed and irritated but eventually became angry and absolutely exhausted. “Gentle hands. We are always gentle with other people’s bodies. You can say, ‘excuse me’ and place your hand gently like this to get their attention.” “Let’s practice. How can you get my attention gently? We were visiting my parents and I was traveling alone with my two-year-old.

Building the Culture of Teamwork through Chores

When I was growing up we did not have a chore chart. There were no stickers, or popsicle sticks or magnets on a whiteboard. There was just an understanding that we pitched in…all hands on deck. My father was in the military until I was about 7, and prior to that, my mother was very sick with breast cancer. For many of my early memories, she was in and out of the hospital and my father worked long hours. We had caregivers and help but there was still a lot to be done.

The Art of Follow Through

Struggling with transitions and routines? Is your child very strong-willed? How do we motivate kids? How do we invite cooperation? How do we find that balance of connection (so they hear you) and firmness? What does follow-through look like? We often hear grown-ups say they have trouble “getting cooperation” but what does that really mean? […]

Wired for Independence: How skills boost self-esteem

“Your preschooler will never learn to make decisions, learn new skills, or trust his own abilities if you don’t make room for him to ​​practice. Parenting in the preschool years involves a great deal of letting go…True self-esteem does not come from being loved, praised or showered with goodies—it comes from having skills…Working together to […]

Siblings: Get them in the ring

The most popular night of my seven-week Positive Discipline parenting series is the night we finally get to talk about siblings. From the first week, this is a source of angst for parents. It is on every list of challenges that we make, and usually the sibling fighting is a trigger that brings out the “Final straw! I’ve had it, that’s it!” moment in the night where we turn into the version of our parents we swore we would never become. It takes a full six weeks of building on parenting tools before we can get to this meaty and layered challenge. In this class, I always start by asking that same question, “what did you learn from your siblings?” After some scoffing, the answers range from: